Top 10 Hilarious Host Budget Gifts: Couch Surfing Gifts

Want to do something useful for your hosts as a weekend guest or while couch surfing? Here are several low budget and DIY gift ideas to get you started.

When it comes to traveling around the country or around the world, most students rely upon websites CouchSurfing.org in order to make ends meet. However, in this form of travel, there is always the task of doing something special for your host or hostess.

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As a conscientious guest that wants to bring a smile to the face of every person they stay with worldwide, a few budget ideas outside of the gourmet food hostess gift ideas that you find at places like Amazon.com are helpful.

Funny post-its where they least expect its

The key to humor is the element of surprise. When you only have a night, a backpack, and a kitchen, you may not think you have enough tools to create a comedic gift. Thankfully, you are mistaken. With a fresh pad of post-its and a marker, you can leave funny notes in hidden places throughout your host's refrigerator and cupboard.

Silly scavenger hunt

If you're a fan of games, consider purchasing a large number of plastic spiders and hiding them all over your host's house. When they find a spider, you give them a tiny prize from your home city or country.

Homemade bug kits

There is certainly a risk in giving or receiving this type of gift and some hosts can feel insulted if they don't understand that this is simply a measure of good faith. However, there are a number of bug related homemade gifts that are easy for couch surfers to give as thank you presents. When decorated with a fun loving state of mind, most of the people that get these homemade bug repellents and fly traps find them very funny, useful, and thoughtful.

Ice breaker game with kinky charades

Of course, as a house guest, you don't want to be known as the creepy guy that slept on a couch. However, depending on the dynamics of the group, one way to get everyone laughing is with silly ice breaker games. For example, staying the night with an elderly couple can get a lot more interesting if they're the type of people that would like to play a kinky game of Charades with visiting college students.

DIY jury rig home repair

In order to charm your hosts, a humorous couch surfer will attempt to do a home repair that does not result in thousands of dollars in damages. For example, if you notice a vase is broken and in the recycling bin, a good guest will offer to fix it. Adding a few laughs and a few drinks to this combination can only result in you leaving a positive mark in their couch surfing experiences.

WWZGD? What would Zach Galifanakis do? And would he do it with Demetri Martin?

Sometimes, when you can't figure out what to do concerning social awkwardness, the best approach is to be comedic and yet subtle. In other words, personifying comedians Zach Galifanakis or Demetri Martin versus Pauley Shore or Robin Williams can be a safe route to take. Always keep in mind, sometimes the best thing you can give your host is your silence and the occasional funny body language gesture.

How to use Maria Bamford's voice as raccoon repellent

Many people forget that they love impressions. If there is an annoying situation going on, sometimes using a funny voice can lighten the mood. For example, possums and raccoons that won't take a hint. Perhaps everyone will appreciate the pest repellent aspects of Maria Bamford's voice as a way to be a positive contributor to the household chores at the place your couch surfing.

What tricks to teach pets that leave hosts shocked

When you are traveling with only a suitcase, it pays to have the gift of ideas to give to your host. One of the things that most people have in common is pets. For example, your tip about keeping the dog from eating his own poop by feeding him pineapple will make them remember their favorite couch surfer forever.

No stone literally left unturned

Unless you are afraid of snakes, you can create simple designs by lifting stones. If there is a big bed of multi-colored rocks surrounding a tree, why not arrange them artistically to transmit a funny stone-age text message to your host?

Educate the kids on homosexuality and transgendered options

Actually, I saved this one for last on purpose. Although there are many good jokes to tell, ones that should be left out of your joke circulation involve making fun of gays, transgendered individuals, other races, religions, and ethnicities. When you tell jokes and give gifts that do not make others the butt, then you are well on your way to true comedy that does not reinforce negative aspects of bullying, homophobia, and other kinds of hate.

Naturally, being a polite and sophisticated guest is one of the most inexpensive gifts that any host would like to receive.

10 Foods to Avoid Donating to a Food Bank

Free food is not always good food.  You will know this if you are on the receiving end of the donation process.  For the rest of the world that is fortunate enough to be temporarily-non-homeless, here is a list I have compiled from my own experiences.

We all have times of the year, like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other holidays where we donate canned and non perishable foods to the homeless. However, I feel that the general public is not informed about helpful items that can be donated. I will be, of course, be speaking from my own experiences with disability and as a recipient of publicly donated food.

Anyone Can Become Homeless

When you are donating to the homeless, you should be donating to your self. Although homelessness may seem far away, the truth is that anyone can become disabled or homeless in less than 5 seconds. Think, for example, of the victims of Mother Nature. You can also lose your house, job, and everyone you ever knew in no time.

We cannot know the life and story of every person. We cannot know why they became homeless. What we do know is that for every person that "uses the system", there are many more that go without because of public apathy. So donate and donate well! Every little bit truly makes a difference.

Top 10 Items To Avoid Donating

1. High Sodium Foods
2. Processed Foods
3. Potato Chips
4. Poor Quality Meats
5. Expired Goods
6. Glass Containers
7. Items Containing MSG
8. Baby Formula
9. Items that are NOT ready to eat
10. DeCaf Coffee

Keep In Mind - Most Food Bank Recipients Can NOT Cook

Consider how your donation can be used. Not everyone who receives a food bank donation can cook food. There are many good reasons for this. Perhaps they don't have access to a kitchen because they are homeless. Or, maybe they do have a kitchen but have a disability that means they can't cook food.
For example, one popular bad donation is macaroni and cheese. To prepare mac and cheese, you would need:

1. extra ingredients,
2. cooking utensiles,
3. access to water,
4. access to a stove,
5. access to the physical ability to prepare food,
6. access to food preparation knowledge,
7. and access to utilities.

Most poor people can struggle with any of these luxuries.

Similar items are food donations that need to be mixed with other items before eating such as:

* various mixes - cake mix, pancake mix, and bread mix.
* whole grains like rice
* pasta

Other Items to Avoid:

* microwave items
* items that must be cooked before they are eaten

****avoid instant noodles or ramen noodles. They offer little nutritional value and often contain MSG and other chemicals.

Expired Goods, Baby Formula and Decaf Coffee - A Cocktail for Failure

When it comes to donating foods, most people are doing an absent minded and random grab of anything they don't like to eat. They clear their cupboard shelves of anything with dust on it and don't think twice. Amongst those random items are anything we bought by accident.

Expired Food - Of course, we aren't encouraging people to throw away perfectly good food. However, thinking ahead on purchases can be more than thoughtful. The only non-perishable items that do have expiration dates are baby formula and food. All other items have manufacturers' "best sell by" or "use by dates", which are not regulated by the FDA, USDA, or public health departments. They are random dates selected by the manufacturers and really do not reflect a true meaning of food expiration.

Baby Formula - This is something very specific to an individual baby. Once a baby starts using a particular formula, they can't switch very easily. If you are interested in providing baby formula, call ahead to the local women's shelter and see what they have to say about it. For all you know, they have a grant that takes care of it. They could really use your money and focus for other items.

Decaf Coffee - I always see stacks of Decaf Coffee at food banks. No one ever gives it away because of laws that state that it is not actually a staple item for the diet. When in doubt, don't give decaf. Plus, how many people do you know that like Decaf?

What Food Banks Could Use More Of

When it comes to figuring out what kinds of canned foods to buy and donate, there are a few pointers to consider.

1. Protein is under-represented.
- Good donations are canned means that are not full of nitrates and sulfides. For example - canned hams and pork are usually bad ideas. Some no refridgeration necessary items like bacon are also not good. Meat jerky, nuts, canned beans, peanut or other nut butters, canned tuna, canned chicken, and prepared stews and sauces with meat can be a great idea.

2. Low Quality Meat is over represented.
- Avoid donating items like with bad protein like canned tamales and raviolis. These items have little nutritional value and the meat is of poor quality. Raviolis and the like usually have a lot of fat, are highly processed, and contain too much salt.

3. Sugar is over represented
- Most food banks are doing very well with donations from local cooking schools, bakeries, and supermarkets in one particular area. That area is bread and pastry. Anything sweet that you can donate is usually not a fortunate option for the poor, disabled, and homeless. They also may not have the ability or option to cook something. So avoid donating condensed milk and other canned sugar items.

4. Avoid Random Items
- Although you may have a canned sauce that you like a lot, think about how it will probably NOT be associated with other canned items a person will receive. In other words, AVOID random items like sauces, chutneys, or specific ethnic preparations. Food Banks don't always use discretion when giving out bags of food. Instead of having something like soup or corn, a person may be rationed to the can of food you donated. So make sure your donation matters!

5. Encourage Healthy Ready to Eat Options That Need No Preparation
- It is tempting to add "just add water" items to this list. In particular, dried soup powders and dried refried beans. However, there are plenty of ready to eat foods out there that aren't a bunch of junk and don't require water to reconstitute them. For example, trail mixes, canned nuts, and dried fruits.

Assessing the Donation Sites - Perishable versus Non-Perishable Food Donations

Of course, if it can be bruised, its not necessarily BAD to donate. Just keep in mind that most food donation centers may hold certain items longer.

For example, if you are donating through your workplace.

- You will want to keep it to non-perishible goods. However, if you have a large quantity of perishable goods, you may want to donate to the source where people are being feed.

For example: large amounts of bread, pastry, vegetables, fruits, or dairy.

- You can probably go to a free food kitchen in your community or donate it to a church that is known for its generosity to elders and the disabled.

Top 5 Foods To Donate - A Quick List To Keep In Mind

When in doubt, the answer is PROTEIN!

1. Dried foods (meat jerky, dried fruits, nuts, and even dried veggies!)
2. Canned Chicken and Fish
3. Canned Low Sodium Soups and stews
4. Canned Fruits / Canned Vegetables ALSO CANNED BEANS!
5. Nut butters like peanut butter, cashew butter, and almond butter

Shout Out To The Best & Worst Food Banks I Know

Let's hear it for Lexington, Kentucky!

In my 4 years of struggling with disabilities, I relied on food banks heavily. I also had to move around a lot (my only option was to stay with friends because I had no family). In my moving around, I was able to go to many food banks across the United States.

In all my experiences, the worst food bank was in San Francisco, CA. There, if I received any food at all, it was usually limited to 2 or three items. One time, my food bank gift was a package of expired frozen sausage patties, a bag of seaweed, and a bag of shrimp chips. This was at a time where I was homeless. Therefore, I had no place to store the sausage patties OR cook them. I also couldn't eat them raw. The other two items made me really sick when I ate them.

My best experience with food banks comes from Lexington, Kentucky. That was one of the most dignified experiences by far. Not only do they allow you to PICK OUT what you want and put it in the shopping cart, but they also provided tons of freebies and extras. Once a month, I could go there and get 20 canned items, a pound of butter, a dozen eggs, 5 pounds of vegetables, 2 loafs of bread, and one giant dessert (usually a whole cake or pie). This was in addition to the government commodities.

Writing this and thinking about the respect, encouragement, and love I received from the people in Lexington, KY brings tears to my eyes. Thank you so much God's Pantry on Broadway in Lexington, KY for doing the right thing!!!

God's Pantry was founded by Mim Hunt in 1955 from her car and home in Lexington,KY. Mim Hunt wished for everyone to be treated with dignity and respect. I am pleased to say that she can look down from heaven and see that her work lives on through the kind people at God's Pantry in Lexington, KY.